How Unfair
by Clockwork Night
Summary: In which it is Sean that finds TJ that night in the club, not Bud Warnings for *Male/male relationships* *drug use* *suicide attempts*


**There is a serious lack of love for Political Animals and even less for Sean/TJ**

**A story in where it wasn't Bud who found TJ, but Sean.**

**I adore this show, **

**Enjoy**

**I don't own anything..**

How Unfair

There was something about TJ Hammond that Sean loved, even if he was political enemies with TJ's mother. he was just... attracted to him.

Which is why it broke his heart to do what he did to TJ. He said things that the drug addict never needed to hear. And He broke TJ's heart.

He didn't know about what TJ had done after word. He left, telling the press he needed to see his beautiful children, and he did; he stayed by their sides for four weeks, as long as he could. His mind never left the thought of TJ's face, his lips, his sweet voice.

And that smile... oh God that smile... TJ hardly ever truly smiled, but even Sean could tell when he told TJ that they had love at first sight. He smiled only briefly, just a split second before taking the man into another loving kiss, letting Sean take him in passion again, but Sean could tell, he had made TJ smile.

He saw it on the news after three months after the break up, TJ's medical records had been discovered and it was found out that it was not a reaction to medication that sent him to the hospital, no... it was a suicide attempt. Sean's heart shattered as the news reporter showed a photograph of the former first son, the first openly homosexual son of a president.

And he had broken TJ's heart.

He saw the man again on the night his nightclub was suppose to open, TJ had talked about it many, many times during their time together, TJ promised he would stay clean and open this nightclub, he would finally do something that put him on the map for being more than just a gay president's son. He looked stunning, classy... he looked happy.

But he had to say something... any thing.

So he opened his big mouth. "I'm sorry... the report, I saw it.. are you..."  
"It's old news." TJ said, not even letting him finish his sentence, he had a file that was before in his hands but now rest on the chair he sat on. The two shook hands like political men they were when Sean just wanted to take TJ in a kiss and never let that man go.

"You should come to the nightclub opening tonight." TJ said, staring into his eyes hopefully, he had missed Sean more than words could ever spell. Elaine said that Sean Reeves was just playing with him, screwing with his heart, but TJ said otherwise, he was in love with Sean.

Sean had not played TJ once, every kiss, every word he meant, except for those spoken at their bad break up. He wanted to apologize. He called TJ disgusting, that sex was only good if he closed his eyes and he felt horrid after he left TJ's house. Those were all lies! But the damage was done, and TJ winded up in the hospital because of it. TJ began to get that look, that look of being utterly in love with someone he could never have.

Sean tried to pull away, he knew that if the press caught wind of a homosexual congressman, a man with a beautiful wife and two kids... he would be torn to pieces. He had to do this.

"Yeah, I'll try to be there." He smiled that perfect, politician's smile that only made TJ realize that yet again Sean was leaving him.

But TJ still had his hopes, he had just gotten in an argument with his extremely unsupportive family and came with his sponsor, his sober buddy, he was handed the drugs he had a feeling he would need. He was an addict, he couldn't stop,

Then he saw _ his_ name. Sean Reeves... his knuckles turned white as he clinched the table, staring at the V.I.P place card. He was like a child who couldn't let it go, Sean was like a Rubik's Cube, impossible to figure out.

He searched for hours for a man who was in his office building, thinking about him. TJ had hoped and even prayed that Sean would come, that Sean would be there for him...But he never came.

He knew his sponsor wouldn't forgive him for this, but as he snorted up the addictive ivory substance, as his mind began to loose all hope for regaining that sobriety that it held for three weeks, he honestly didn't give a shit. It made him laugh because it was all because of one man, one moronic, 'straight' man who he was madly in love with and never expected to be. What was even funnier was that said man was far, far away with children he promised to leave and a wife he constantly complained about.

TJ took a shaky breath as Gunner and he kissed for the who knew how many time that night, he needed this, a distraction from the fact that the man who's name was on a slip of paper in his back pocket would never come. He knew that he made a promise... a promise that he wouldn't take that white substance so neatly lined in a row for him to ruin his life once again. He took a long snort, smirking as Gunner tried to get him to stop even though a woman's hands was halfway down Gunner's pants and he honestly couldn't complain. The music was beating far too loud for TJ's liking and he couldn't bring himself to want to be anywhere near it.

He gripped onto the banister that kept him standing up, knowing that he was loosing it quickly. He felt as if his stomach was being carved out with a butter knife. His heart was heavy and TJ knew it wasn't the drugs making him feel this way.

The Drugs were just an escape, just a false hope that maybe one day he would be able to feel again without wanting to die. His eyes trailed up to the white painted ceiling and he wanted to scream. How did no one see that the so called perfect Hammond son was dying on the inside. His own twin didn't even seem to care anymore!

He pushed open the door to a small room he designed for his own private use, he knew he would need just one place... even if at a night club to take his attention away and bring him back to reality. He brought his hand to his nose and snorted just a bit more. That was always his little ploy, just one more hit... just one more... it won't hurt...

TJ collapsed to his knees, shaking in the raw agony of Sean Reeves, of Elaine Barrish and her campaign, of Bud Hammond and their bull shit, of Douglas... his own twin... and of the drugs. For without that snowy white powder he felt nothing.

He heard the sound of footsteps, finding the sound odd and slightly frightening, the music was so loud... why were those footsteps so loud?!

"_TJ?!"_

The brunette didn't answer, he wanted nothing more to sleep, just a quick rest... just to step away from the real world for only a moment.

The world went dark, leaving him in death's grip.

The door was harder to open that Sean had hoped but he managed to bust the large wood object out of his way. His shoulder ached from the force but he didn't care. He heard the heart shattering thump of TJ hitting the ground and he came as quickly as he could.

The politician stopped in his tracks.

TJ lay on the ground, his eyes closed, his body so perfectly placed it was like a movie. He moved slowly, fearful of waking the beauty laying there though he knew his fear was irrational. Suddenly the realization of what was happening hit Sean..

"TJ!" He screamed, running forward, regardless of the two very confused body guards behind him. Sean ran to his former love, lifting him up by the head, terrified of how cold he was.

"_Call an ambulance!'_

_CLockwork transition_

_The white color of the hospital room was the first thing TJ Hammond saw when he opened his eyes, everything was so bright... so... light... He had never seen such a bright glow. Was this death? _

_He felt so weightless, like his body could just float from the stainless hospital bed but there was something holding him down. _

_His mother's _hand.

He groaned softly as his eyes opened gingerly, the brightness was gone, replaced with the normal shine of florescent lights above him. There was a weight on his chest, the brunette slowly sat up, removing the hand from his. He heard the small thud of the hand hitting the bed and looked over.

He gasped slightly, his throat aching.

This was not his mother... this was Sean.

TJ reached forward, almost terrified to touch the man, afraid to wake him and send him away once more. "W-Why..." he whispered, trying so hard to hold back the tears he knew were ready to spill at any moment.

Why had Sean done it? TJ was ready to go...

He felt the man move under his touch, watching as blue eyes opened.

"Because I'm sorry."


End file.
